#it was miserable and i still didn't get it in on time

[robinminustherichard]

Just Remember, I'm On Your Side

8×17 Coda/Fix It | BuckTommy | G

Someone is knocking on Tommy's door at 10:30 PM, and he knows he's in for it when he peaks out and sees a familiar truck in his driveway. He sighs, braces himself, and opens the door.

He gets one look at Evan and everything he was thinking flies out the window.

Evan is disheveled--he's got a hoodie thrown on over pajama pants and his hair looks like he's run his hands through it a hundred times. Worst, however, are his red eyes and long lashes clumped together with the remnants of tears.

"Evan--" Tommy says, knowing he sounds concerned and his face probably matches.

Evan swallows thickly and looks up at Tommy in the way that always seemed to lead Tommy to trouble.

"You," Evan starts, and takes a deep hiccuping breath, "you said once that you thought maybe my friends weren't always the nicest they could be to me--"

Tommy does remember saying that. Evan had blown it off then, excusing behavior from some of the 118 as he told stories of things they had been through.

"--I didn't want to hear it, then." Evan finishes. He runs his hand through his hair, looks around like someone is watching them. His eyes track back to Tommy's. "I think I'm ready to hear it, now."

Tommy feels shell shocked for a moment, not knowing quite what to say when your ex-boyfriend shows up following what's gotta be the worst few weeks of his life and suddenly wants to hear about how his friends frankly are kind of jerks sometimes.

Evan fidgets in the silence, nervous. He begins talking.

"And, and I know, Tommy, that I don't have the right to come here after what I said. But I think you might be the first person in a long time that has--has thought about me. Really thought about me and how I feel, and I got in this fight with Eddie and he said I make everything about myself, and then he brought Chris from El Paso and they're in my house now and I had to get out before I--"

"Evan," Tommy interrupts gently. He holds out a hand across the threshold, "Do you want to come in?"

Evan stops, blinking back new dampness in his eyes. He nods quickly before agreeing verbally.

"Th-thank you, Tommy," Evan whispers, grabbing on to Tommy's hand and letting himself be pulled inside.

He stumbles a bit and Tommy catches him; and maybe it's the exhaustion that's been dogging him since the night at the lab, but Tommy affords himself the comfort of gathering Evan up into his arms, tucking him into Tommy's body as much as one could with someone of Evan's physique.

Evan seemed to go boneless, choking back an unmistakable sob and burying his face into Tommy's shoulder.

"Eddie came at me," Buck says shakily, mumbled and nearly inaudible, "it was the first time that...I thought he might actually hit me."

"I'll kill him," Tommy says simply and without thought, knowing he meant it.

Evan snorts unattractively at that, pulling out of Tommy's shoulder and looking him in the eyes.

"I know you would." Evan says simply.

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I've already committed two crimes for you, Evan Buckley. What's a little manslaughter?"

Evan laughs outright at that, wet and still a little miserable but a grin comes with it. It falls a bit though, and his eyes skitter around before speaking again.

"Can we...can we talk? Please?" Evan asks, biting at his lip.

Tommy knows how this is going to go. He knew it when he answered Evan's call three weeks ago, he knew it when he watched Evan break down on those monitors, he knew it when he saw the detached stoicism Evan maintained with a white knuckle grip at the funeral.

"How about..." Tommy says, pulling away but keeping their hands together, "I make you a sandwhich and you drink a glass of water, and then we get into bed and then, if you're still awake, we can talk?"

Evan breathes out, and hesitant smile lighting up his face.

"Yes--yes, please," he says in a rush, nodding again, "I would--I would love that, Tommy."

Tommy takes a chance then, he pulls Evan in to his side and presses his lips to Evan's birthmark. He feels something within himself settle, and he hears Evan sigh and feels his shoulders relax.

"Come on, sweetheart."

[olderthannetfic]

"princess and pea" anon who loves to complain in your inbox about fake fandom problems (they are REAL. I joke but every time I previously sent an anon I was miserable with anxiety)

every single serious word of advice about the difficulties of improv/playing Fic Volleyball when touching on noncon/dubcon subjects was gratefully received. I'm not kidding about that: you guys laid out the problem and solution and helped me tremendously.

you, joking: this is a silly problem you're having with mutual that, in romance-land, would end in marriage.

me: gross. I have nothing but the highest respect for mutual and their excellent meta and their extraordinarily writing skills and their incredibly fun prompts that hit just right -- ahh.

fuck.

yeah maybe some of my anxiety/overthinking was the result of a little parasocial crush goddamnit. well. that's embarrassing.

*sigh*

(things I wanna be super clear on: never in this life would I bother mutual about something like that, I think we all get fandom crushes on people but it's been a while for me so I legit didn't notice!, many writers play dolls with each other without getting a crush so nobody panic about your own mutuals and their desire to yell about fic with you, I'm sure their hearts are pure. have I covered all my bases?)

ANYWAYS. (an actual brag to follow) someone said "refuse to feel sorry for you about this problem, you're living your best fandom life" and I would like to tell that person: thank you for the reality check. it's actually better than you think?

I have MULTIPLE friendly and smart mutuals who recommend glorious fanworks at the drop of a hat like I'm an empress getting fed peeled grapes. I have a Fandom Buddy (🩶🩶🩶) whose OTP is not my OTP but still! is usually ready to play/sends me inspiration for my own shipping nonsense or their OTP. like. actually my fandom life is incredible and your commenter was right, it's important to notice that?

(I'm actually not bragging for the sake of it, that'd be crazy rude, this is a reminder for myself when it pops up in @olderthannetfic's queue that I'm very spoiled, from a fandom perspective, and I need to treasure my joy)

--

Heh.

[aturzz]

a/n : first time writing these kinds of fanfiction lol. no use of y/n. bluelock x g/n!reader. this is so fun to write somehow 😭 i didn't proofread too

english is my second language btw! so... you're leaving for a business trip, huh? cool. but it wouldn't be that easy when you're the blue lock's manager. those assholes wouldn't leave you alone. now you're at the airport, having no idea what to do with bachira. he had been whining loud enough for everyone to hear and clinging to you like a lifeline. isagi is having trouble separating you two. "you can't just leave us like that for one week!" bachira cries, holding on you so tight it hurts. it's like, 15 more minutes until your plane takes flight. you can't keep staying here. "get off, bachira, you might make them miss their flight!" said isagi, the one who's still struggling to get bachira off you. the three of you look like a chaotic disaster at the airport, and there's no way to help, nor to interrupt. then, someone grabs bachira's collar, freeing you from the man's grasp. you didn't have time to see who that was, but his voice is too iconic to not recognize. "fuck off, blondie." barou huffs, glaring at bachira. you laughed softly, sending a "thank you" his way before going straight to your gate, being hyper aware of how your phone is blowing up. something like "we can't live without you." but, oh boy, you had already turned off the wifi. then how are they going to survive through 7 days without you? day 1 : everybody acts normal. sometimes they ask for a water bottle out of instinct, but everything is normal so far. only bachira is whining and crying about how you're absent throughout the day. the phone to call for the manager's support at every room left untouched. you only get two calls from anri and from ego to check if you landed safely. day 2 : everybody still acts normal, though now bachira has someone to whine and cry with about your absence : charles. it's kind of annoying so raichi kicked their asses and got warned by ego. he actually looks for you to randomly annoy you (he forgot that you're not in the facility.) the phone is now touched by bachira to call for you. you got bombed with sobs, but after all, everybody gangsta. day 3 : everybody shits and giggles except for karasu randomly groaning at practice about how he keeps forget that you're gone (so he can ruffle your hair and get a glare from you). otoya pick up that too and now they're collectively complaining about how inconvenient it is when you're not here. that affects everyone a little. bachira stop whining eventually, but he didn't score as much as normal. lavinho is quite concerned so he called for you. you had to praise bachira to get him scoring. day 4 : chigiri found kunigami scrolling through the playlist you made for him when he's at the gym today. he had been listening to that playlist on loop, and he only stops when it comes to practice, conversations or showers. can't blame him, chigiri talked about how he wants you to brush his hair too (he said no one brushes his hair like you do). everybody's mood drops for a little, since your love language is words of affirmation, and they are used to your praises. they didn't all score as much somehow. day 5 : noa calls you today, as well as chris. they both are about asking when you are coming back, and they both sighs after they heard two more days. nagi refuses to come to practice (reo too), kurona trips over his feet while practice, hiori isn't so productive, yukimiya's glasses keeps slipping (he even forgets his lunch), and many more small incidents like that. bachira spammed you with text. you reassure him that you'll come back soon. with gifts, of course. day 6 : sendou called you. he said oliver is acting weird, he just kinda lays on the ground and stares at the ceiling. barou quitted calling everyone "weaklings" and focus on scoring (which he fails miserably). niko hides in the restroom all day. no one actually did anything but zoning out. his voice sparks up with joy when you told him you're trying to coming back as soon as possible. and your phone bombed with texts. mostly from anri. her : please come back faster you : but you said i need rest her : ....

day 7 : ego left the facility to do-the-thing-everybody-knows, so everyone go out. there's not much thing happens today except for the facility being filled with flowers and stuff. otoya and oliver fights over whose gift is more pretty. day 8 : you come to the airport, only to found isagi and bachira. and when you come back to the facility, all you see in your office is a wave of bouquets, chocolates and some things you can't quite make sense (turns out, they're plushies). you got bachira follows you around, rambling about "missed you" and "please don't leave ever again". these guys are all fools.

[katerinaaqu]

Oh absolutely you do not even need to agree. I am only expressing my own personal opinion and why I have the stance I have but of course you can like it is up to you and of course you can be eager on it or see only the positive it brings. It definitely is your opinion. I respect it. 🙏 I only express why I do not like it

Yup exactly or that people think that in order to do something "trendy" instead on focusing on making it more accurate they do exactly what you say. Basically use the popularity of an old tale to do their random and original stuff they just use the names for popularity and then Basically not do anything of that tale they adapt said or stood for.

Yup you get it. Or worse that you do not matter. "It is popular so who cares?" "There are versions so this is equivalent to your ancient history" or "it is a fake story and fanfiction who cares?" And as you said use it only for anesthetics and fun instead of truly appreciating it. Do we feel happy that our stories continue to inspire? Sure. But why do we need to pay the price of being used like a happy meal advertisement all the time? (By the way I would love to hear more about your culture too)

Oh please not at all do not feel like that because as I said you did your research you actually got curious and showed interest. This definitely is how you are being respectful and you do use your inspiration and enthusiasm for actually delving into it and that is definitely the best way to do it. The fact that you liked the result doesn't make you morally inferior in any way absolutely not. You must never apologize for the things you like especially since you delve into the roots of this culture.

Please never apologize. You must never apologize to anyone since you know and you do separate some things. You enjoy music and you enjoy the feeling of coming together and you definitely bring a good point that indeed in a world where art is underrated (and I know because my brother is a professional musician and barely manages to work at celebrations) artists managed to elevate their careers and make a name for themselves and push forward and indeed that is great the same as it is great that people like you come out of it that actually delve deep and do not consider the retelling as 5he source

But yes speaking on sources should have been the rule not the exception and unfortunately it isn't happening. I definitely understand how such efforts are appreciated which is why I am disappointed because it would have been so awesome if he had used that talent to actually promote the Odyssey instead of something that just uses the Odyssey as a name.

Here's one example that I discussed with a friend; instead of the ridiculous culturally "600 strikes" that made Poseidon one of the most powerful gods look like a boasting idiot and his previous "get in the water" badass song appear like useless empty threats Here's an idea:

Why on earth didn't he put a duet battle between Poseidon and Leucothea?

Like Leucothea appearing giving him her belt. He could play again with the "get in the water" pattern but this time Leucothea encourages him. Then she fights with Poseidon to protect Odysseus..maybe fails miserably but keeps going on occasion singing "get in the water" Odysseus struggling in the water calling for help or chanting the names of people he lost as he struggles. He could make use of the suffering pattern here like Leucothea singing to Poseidon to take the suffering from him.

Even better use the same voice actress of Penelopw to play Leucothea and use the same pattern of Odysseus finding strength hence etc and that is only one example that one could use and make it loose but still be more respectful to the text but given the changes it wouldn't mean much at that point but GOSH would I appreciate it more than whatever the hell happened in that saga!

Thank you for understanding and please do not feel the need to change your taste or opinion on the musical swayed by this only. But I am happy that you understand where I come from and of course I will continue my work even if no one sees it because that is MY passionate project!

Most people on Tumblr: Yay! We can have a musical based on the Iliad! Me after seeing what happened with Odyssey plot especially the last saga and the fandom logic inserting the ancient sources (again):

[chiefbeifongcanrailme]

Lin x Bumi

Lin gets badly hurt and Bumi can't come because he is a commander and when he does come Lin thinks he does not care for her .

make it angst pleas

Hiii! Even though this is angst, I had a lot of fun writing this🥰

Thanks for the prompt!

The letter had arrived in the morning. By evening, Bumi had paced enough steps on the deck to have reached Republic City on foot. His whole life, the Commander wished he was an airbender but for the first time, he wished he could will the water to freeze so he could walk his way to Lin.

How could he abandon his ship? Had it been Tenzin or one of his kids, Commander Bumi would have the perfect excuse. But Lin was nobody to him- even if in reality she was. And that meant he could abandon Lin?

But Iroh was there- he would take care of things. Iroh knew how he felt about her and maybe, just maybe, she would let the young General into her space and allow him help her.

Bumi couldn't fathom what Amon must have put his Lin through. It was precarious- their relationship. He wanted to be with her, to hold her and tell her everything was going to be okay. That not having bending wasn't all that bad- he came a long way without it, didn't he? But of course, all of that was assuming Lin wanted him by her side. She wasn't some kind of injured bird who'd let him pick her up and put her back together. If anything, Lin was like a feral pygmy puma who'd hide away while she licked her wounds, out of sight. Bumi would be but a worried vagabond with a bowl full of food in hand and no idea where she might be taking sanctuary.

But on the flip side, maybe she wanted him there. Bumi pressed his hand against his chest and hoped, prayed to the spirits- if there were any listening to his heart in that moment- not for a lot though. Just for even the tiniest part of Lin to wish he was there.

Just then, another notice arrived.

It was suffice to that Lin felt completely miserable. For the first time her emotional pain was physical- or her physical pain was emotional- she couldn't decide which, but it was the worst kind she was sure. Naturally, she hid her agony well. It was true, she was more worried about Korra- the Avatar's bending mattered more than hers in the grand scheme of things. And somewhere in her own torment of pain and worry for the world, Lin realized she was hurting more because he wasn't by her side.

For once, it wasn't Tenzin whom she wanted to be comforted by. But as misfortune would have it, the airbender kept hovering around her. She couldn't bear it. Amon's cage was less torture than having Tenzin check in on her every five minutes.

Bumi was not going to leave his fleet- not when Iroh was here already. The Commander had no reason to be there- he had responsibilities- the same way the Chief is responsible for her city. She lost her bending to protect her people.

But say the Commander of the United Forces was unimaginably incapacitated, would the Chief happen to take some time off?

Generally, Lin avoided dwelling on these thoughts entirely, but while she was indisposed, thinking about Bumi brought her some respite. It didn't matter that she was missing him and how it made her sad that their nameless relationship came devoid of all expectations- Bumi floating through her mind was remedy enough.

Hopefully Katara would be able to help- if not her, at least Korra. Even if the old waterbender used up all her healing capabilities to help the Avatar, Lin wouldn't complain. Maybe she'd perserve. Maybe she'd still train at the metalbending academy. Or, just maybe, she'd retire and put herself above others.

Perhaps she'd find Bumi in the middle of the ocean and convince him to run off with her.

No. Never. Clearly Bumi didn't care as much as she did.

If she ever retired, Bumi would be the last person to see her.

Lin put her coat on over her uniform as she made her way to the Republic City dock. Katara was their only hope now- and that was the only hope she was going to allow herself to cling to.

But just as she got on board—

"Chief Linny Beifong!!"

[jusiri]

Gotta say, i think the peak of my school performance is gonna be that on our last project of the semester, on the project that all of the upperclassmen said they hated, that people said made them cry

when my teacher was having individual discussions with each of us to go over any mistakes we made and explain it, when i went to talk to him, he said that there's about 15-20 mistakes that students will typically make

and i didn't make any of them

And frankly i dont think im gonna do that well in something ever for the rest of my whole academic career lmao

[lightningidle]

Fig's line "I don't think I'm an artist, I think I'm just a good friend" has not left my head at all. Just...

You're Fig Faeth and your horns came in over the summer and you pick up the bard class as a form of adolescent rock 'n' roll rebellion, and it works! It's exactly the outlet you need! You give a guy you just met drumsticks and you start a band and it's good enough that within a year and a half you're touring. You are, in every sense, good at being a bard.

And then, finally, your junior year, you start to take it seriously. Your art goes from an outlet and a form of rebellion to a practice. A discipline. (Can rebellion exist within a discipline?) Your classmates know what they want to do with their work. They all have a thesis statement. And yeah, there's cohesion in the music you make, but you've never had to think about why you make it. You've never sat down and dissected what it is about bass that speaks to you. You've never poured over your lyrics to pick at any deeper meaning. Why should you? You don't play music for a grand design, you do it to... huh, why do you do it?

(Your art is the one form of self-expression that feels as safe as Disguise Self does, because even if you're pouring your heart onto the page and then screaming it in front of thousands of people, it's not like you're really making yourself known. You can sing I'm lonely, I'm scared, I'm furious, and your fans will sing it right back, and there will still be the distance between performer and audience to keep your heart safe.)

Now you're being asked to look inward to explain the artistic choices you're making, and you can't help but recoil at that, because you'd rather do anything than look inward. Meanwhile, your classmates have no problem with it, so you start to wonder if you're a real artist at all. Can your art be authentic if it only exists to bolster a thesis statement? Has your art been unauthentic this whole time because you've never really thought about a thesis statement before? Is that what makes it art, and not just the next track on somebody's teen angst playlist?

You can't think about yourself— acknowledging your own existence makes you want to puke. So if your music is an extension of yourself, (and it is, even if it's just because the spotlight reveals only what you want it to,) you can't think about your music. You can't. You have to. Your grade depends on it.

You're Fig Faeth, and you keep multiclassing because you'd rather be a good friend than a great artist. If introspection is what great art demands, then fuck it. You must not be a bard at all.

[caterjunes]

i know my body is doing its best but christ alive.

[zooblesbutchpuppygirl]

Cool so at 4 almost 5 am my brain decides What if you had a dream about how you don't fit in at all with your family, a panic attack the minute you wake up and started thinking about if Zooble would Acrually love you or leave you for someone else given the chance lol and I'm once again forced to just sit there. Cool thanks brain that Really helps 👍 /Heavy sarcasm wtf this sucks :[

[ask-artsy-oncie]

I wish I was not an unintelligent manchild.

[drop--pop--candy]

always silly when people are like "things get better. they've been better so obviously they will get there again" like first of all that's not how this works. but second of all they've never been Better I was just less aware of it

[tardis--dreams]

Me panicking because i have 9 missed calls and 5 emails talking about my absence and how "a colleague could take over for me" vs. Me knowing it's really not that important no matter how pushy a client is and that on top of it I'm underpaid and have way to much overtime so i shouldn't even care

[heart-bones]

I think. . I am transer than I thought before.

[caterjunes]

we're gonna put our rats up for adoption at the animal rescue. things are. bad. we can't keep their cage clean. grayson gets exhausted taking them out to play and i rarely join bc i just feel empty or disgusted or i start sobbing or wind up in pain or exhausted myself. so they don't get the amount of human interaction they deserve/need.

i feel awful about it. i feel sick. i don't know the last time i've felt like such an abject failure. not just as a person responsible for small lives but as a partner. grayson gets such joy from these boys, and they are so sweet to us too. i just. i can't even take care of myself. it isn't fair. it's not fair.

[thecodeveronica]

Oh boy, Dead by Daylight patch time tomorrow. You know what that means! Time for me to unreasonably get my hopes up for new RE skins to be in the datamine and then feel the crushing disappointment when they aren't!

[yellow-faerie]

Wow, I have a fic description and a fic title before I've even established a proper fic plot

(this is probably because I'm very excited about this fic and it's potential...)

Edit:

Here are my tags because I started explaining the plot and want it actually in the post rather than just the tags lol: